Pain is a funny thing. When you feel it, at a particular level, it takes over your life. Work, play, sitting, moving - whatever. The pain is #1 in your brain. Sometimes, if you are strong, you can "tune it out" but then, zing, it comes back. Since getting back home, we've struggled a bit with getting my pain medicaton just right. During the surgery, the doctors had to work on a patch of flesh inside my hip, next to my sciatic "notch". Between that and the in-operation radiation, it kind've got pretty roughed up. We thought we had it licked after consulting the pain service at MD Anderson, but the drugs stopped working as well as they did in the beginning.
People say "You're so strong to go through this" and I appreciate their complements, but I'm not always stromg. When the pain is at it's peak, and the drugs that used to work, don't anymore, and you're not sure if there is a solution out there (because you're not thinking straight - because all you can think about it the pain). --- you don't feel all that strong.
Thankfully, I have the best patient advocate in the world. Sheila helped me through it and (with some help from our friends) we got an appointment with the local pain service. It's too soon to say we've licked it 100%, but with the new presciption, I'm feeling much better tonight. If you feel pain, keep working on the solution. With physical pain, there are many medications and it may take a while to get the "mix" just right. Keep trying. Tell the docs how you feel. Chances are they can make it better.
It is such a relief. With the pain no longer acting as a "filter" on my experience, I appreciate even more, my situation. I have lived with cancer for 5 years and now, I have a decent chance of beating it. My last lab results showed a CEA level below 1. (this is VERY good news. No detectable cancer in my body). I have been given a new life. Cool.
People say "You're so strong to go through this" and I appreciate their complements, but I'm not always stromg. When the pain is at it's peak, and the drugs that used to work, don't anymore, and you're not sure if there is a solution out there (because you're not thinking straight - because all you can think about it the pain). --- you don't feel all that strong.
Thankfully, I have the best patient advocate in the world. Sheila helped me through it and (with some help from our friends) we got an appointment with the local pain service. It's too soon to say we've licked it 100%, but with the new presciption, I'm feeling much better tonight. If you feel pain, keep working on the solution. With physical pain, there are many medications and it may take a while to get the "mix" just right. Keep trying. Tell the docs how you feel. Chances are they can make it better.
It is such a relief. With the pain no longer acting as a "filter" on my experience, I appreciate even more, my situation. I have lived with cancer for 5 years and now, I have a decent chance of beating it. My last lab results showed a CEA level below 1. (this is VERY good news. No detectable cancer in my body). I have been given a new life. Cool.
5 comments:
what a truly thankful thanksgiving we all will have this year. hope you are able to ENJOY every minute of it. xox
Yay! :) Glad to hear that you are feeling less pain. I wore my Kicking Cancer Ass shirt yesterday in Pittsburgh for ya! :)
Have a happy thanksgiving!
Mark, Sheila
So glad to hear you got home safely. We had all these plans to come visit and bring food to your house when I got a call from the ER in NY stating that my mother fell down the cellar stairs and broke her neck (C1 and C2) and her Rt hand. Walt and I immediately flew to NY. I am just looking at the computer for the 1st time since Nov 6th. My mom is doing much better and we all plan to fly back to Chas. tomorrow. Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. When you feel up to it, lets do dinner.
Lynn and Walt
Pain, shmain...you're still my hero.
Am leaving for Disney World (we are taking a clump of ten for God's sake) and have my Kicking Cancer's Ass sweatshirt to wear.
Hope I don't insult Mickey!
xoxox gene
Hang in there Mark. I find that pain just pisses me off and then wears me down. It is the lack of sleep that really breaks you down over time. I found it helpful to take up a late night hobby that can occupy your mind and allow your spouse to sleep. I play games on the computer and when it is really bad, I read in the jacuzzi. I also perform experiments on displacement and bouyancy. (Will this toilet paper holder float?)
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